The COVID-19 virus rages on and social distancing rules the day.  It has been said that the introverts have been preparing for this moment their entire lives.  Meanwhile, the extroverts suffer what they consider the most hellish experience imaginable.  As the days slowly creep by, and the stay-at-home restrictions are extended seemingly without end, what were new rhythms become old familiar ones.  The uncomfortable closeness with a few family members may be getting easier but, at the same time, the once comfortable distance from all the many others is getting less so...even for the introverts.  Everyone likes their privacy, but no one likes to be alone. Without doubt, this quarantined existence has slowed us down and forced us to reflect on what is truly "essential" to life.  This invisible enemy has made us feel small, vulnerable, and afraid.  Like some sort of Ecclesiastes boot camp on steroids, this virus has [...]

I recently began teaching a marriage class ONLINE.  I have found that there is a real learning curve with this experience.  Teaching to a computer full of faces is not the same as teaching to actual people face to face.  Not only is the technology temperamental, I find that I experience more anxiety and discombobulation than normal.  Moreover, I have taught this marriage material before, countless times.  But, as I have grown and changed, I find the heart of what I want to teach changing as well.  As I get older I am learning what is truly of primary importance and what is probably not-at least today.  Desiring to modify what I have taught has resulted in doing something akin to "building a plane in the sky."  I am sure everyone is confused. The book I am teaching from provides solid biblical truth about what marriage is and how marriage [...]

17 And as he was setting out on his journey, a man ran up and knelt before him and asked him, “Good Teacher, what must I do to inherit eternal life?” 18 And Jesus said to him, “Why do you call me good? No one is good except God alone. 19 You know the commandments: ‘Do not murder, Do not commit adultery, Do not steal, Do not bear false witness, Do not defraud, Honor your father and mother.’” 20 And he said to him, “Teacher, all these I have kept from my youth.” 21 And Jesus, looking at him, loved him, and said to him, “You lack one thing: go, sell all that you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow me.” 22 Disheartened by the saying, he went away sorrowful, for he had great possessions.  - Mark 10.17-27 Some of my resistance to exploring my past experiences, and their impact on my present life, was the fear of wrongly blaming someone [...]

After 46 years of life, I am continuing to learn more about myself.  In some ways I am not who I thought I was, or at least I have never fully understood why I am the who I am.  I remain curious as learn, but also a bit confused as to why God waited so long to reveal these things.  More than likely it's because I was not yet ready to receive whatever I needed to learn.  But that is a blog for another day. Becoming a Story-teller Ironically, in God's divine providence, my bride began a journey into her own story at the same time I began mine.  This has been both painful and hopeful all at the same time.  While my journey began by meeting with a counselor for the first time ever, hers began as part of a counseling training intensive.  Her experienced provided her tools, terms, [...]

The older I get, the more screwed up I realize I am.  For years, I dismissed the idea of "wounds", whether we were talking about wounds of Father, Mother, or circumstance.  It felt too convenient or cowardly to point a finger at someone else as the cause (or at least contributor) of something  broken in me.  In the past year, I have begun to explore what therapists call "my story."  I am not a therapist and, the more I have spent time with these professionals, the more I doubt my ability counsel anyone effectively.  I have gained a deep appreciation for the gift of discernment many of these counselors possess.  I have never looked down on anyone who has sought a counselor to help them with a problem.  That said, I did think "therapy" was great for everyone else but never expected be someone who would benefit personally.  Seeing as [...]